Sandman’s Definitive Ratings – Lesser Hades v Celtic

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Benjamin Nygren celebrates

Benjamin Nygren celebrates. Hearts v Celtic, 25 January 2025. Photo Vagelis Georgariou.

OVERALL – 5/10 – After Thursday’s 2-2 triumph this was 2-2 trauma. Having seen every single Celtic competitive kick of a ball since… Well, since before Graeme came out of the closet (Oh yes he is, and a depraved S&M doggy-masked one at that…) I reckon that’s one of the lowest domestic pass-completion games in Celtic’s modern history. But, really, let’s not miss the greater perspective today…

We were knackered, poor, and on the ropes for much of the match, especially the closing twenty minutes. The unhealthily-excited hordes of Sir Lord Jimmy Crystal were amassed inside the Gorgie Gargoyle Bowl awaiting the coronation of their pretendy champions-elect and after the scurrilous MIBs showed their true tangerine colours and blew their loads far too early, the big opportunity was there to crush us and rocket-fuel their title ambitions.

But they failed.

Them, not us.

We somehow escaped intact after one of the most inept Celtic attempts at a title-barny seen this century, at least. They got a point, we got a grimly wrought-out confidence boost for a squad that was on its knees mentally just a month ago. We also got a look at a new player who might be an actual goalscoring striker with presence and pace, if we can manage to get the ball into the opposition penalty area anytime in the remaining games.

So, amazingly, a deteriorating horrorshow of a performance, nowhere near Celtic levels, BUT… No real harm done. Look ahead – a week left to bolster the playing staff and possible Euro play-off qualification to further replenish and reinforce the squad’s self-belief.

The incestuous Tangerine County fleg-sheggin’ cousins can now focus on molesting each other before we meet in the league again; Celtic just require to find that innate late-winter winning habit and put a string of results together.

Temporarily down, but nowhere near out.

Go Away Now

Sandman

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About Author

The Celtic Star founder and editor David Faulds has edited numerous Celtic books over the past decade or so including several from Lisbon Lions, Willie Wallace, Tommy Gemmell and Jim Craig. Earliest Celtic memories include a win over East Fife at Celtic Park and the 4-1 League Cup loss to Partick Thistle as a 6 year old. Best game? Easy 4-2, 1979 when Ten Men Won the League. Email [email protected]

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2 Comments

  1. If Celtic manage to win the league it will be with the weakest title winning squad in my memory.
    As an adult I have been a supporter for 60+years.
    Cal Mac is no longer able to dictate midfield and has no support.
    MON and coaching staff working wonders with what they have.
    As for the match officials it has been ever thus.
    Hail Hail.

  2. Similar to you JOHNG —I have been actively supporting Celtic for 71 years . A poor team and the decline could be seen coming for the last two seasons under BR . Journeyman players , brought-in just to keep ahead of the Ibrox Ploughboys and it has backfired on the whole club . This policy was further exasperated by the engagement of :- Paul Tisdale and Wilfreid Nancy—–Where the F##K did they get those two ????
    No left-back to cover when TIERNEY went off at Tynecastle——What the F##K is going on with the B- team & Academy players ? Surely a club of Celtic’s stature should have ” Oven ready ” young players ready to step into the First-team squad , when required . Top English teams do this so why not Celtic ? Or are the Board mis-managing our ” Half-time Draw ” ticket money also ? The present Board are running around with there heads in buckets , thinking they are performing ” World -Class in everything they do ” ?
    They are a crowd of amateurs in Celtic blazers who fail to realise that even despite Celtic’s vast resources ; we now have a team which is no better than most of the lesser clubs in the SPL . A Board who , try to save money by investing in “Bargain Basement” players who are surplus to requirements by other clubs , or are , ” past their SELL-BY date . The Celtic support do not deserve this and they should not suffer these clowns any longer . They bring in Martin O’Neil as a BUFFER to save their backs just as the British Crown established the Orange Order to save their backs in Northern Ireland .
    We are now in the Twenty-first century and the vast majority of the Celtic support are wise to your , “Cheap-skate” tricks—Your days are numbered ; just like some of your players like : – Like Tierney , McGregor , Hetate , Maeda , Yang , Engels , McCowan ,Forest ; to name but a few —-Some have been great servants to Celtic and some have failed to produce but no organisation can progress whist carrying ” Lame Ducks ” . There is no sentiment in business ; the time for change is at hand and as Jock Stein stated , ” The Celtic jersey does not shrink to fit inferior players ” .